Penny being Penny

I know it's the beginning of a brand new year, I should probably be more optimistic towards life or whatever is coming ahead. but I'm just being...me; as low self esteem and pessimistic as always...

There is a saying goes like: everything happen for a reason. my pessimistic and low Self-esteem doesnt happen over night. it accumulates failures of my life and that is where this two fellas developed. good thing is, I think I improve alot as compared to the old me. not entirely optimistic but at least less pessimistic. I once have this idea that I am just nobody even though people do invite me to party and outing. but I just thought they were being nice and courtesy. with or without me make no difference. yea that is how pathetic I was am.

I just hope 2009 wouldn't be another year of disappointment to me. I seriously have had enough.