Epilogue

Ola~

I've not been doing some serious blogging lately. I do realize that okay, Mr. Lim aka Mr. Grace u can stop reminding me each time u see me =P

okay, so we have one more day left to 2010. Like I said before, first 2/3 of the year was the zaman kegelapan of my life. I've almost failed everything I have in my life and I'm really glad that I've got over it and now I'm standing on my own feet again. I can't imagine where will I be if I din manage to pull it through. and the remaining 1/3 of the year was the best time of the year, or I would say it's the best time of my life.

Stepping into 2010, it'll be a brand new start. I've come to another chapter of my life. I am totally thrilled about the days ahead me. I was never this hopeful for the new year to come, and I think it's a good sign =)

let's look at what I've gone through in the year 2009. *only some good ones*

New year eve count down at The Curve
excuse the hairstyle *ahem ahem*

Penang Trip! I miss the seafood we had...

Malacca 1 day trip with Psychos...
great food with great people..

caught in a sumo fight in St. Patrick day..
n stop starring at the nipples, I feel offended wtf

prank a poor fella named Yung Lin
He stood there for at least a minute, blindfolded.
Namoamitabah, karma goes to Bob please.

accidentally celebrated my 33rd birthday
10 years in advance FML

bid my BFFL goodbye at the airport

Gathering with Horng, HC and Celeste at Fronterra, Jaya One
*caption doesnt really match with the picture bt it was taken the same night*

Steamboat at Tshui Sun's
because I only have picture of the food,
hence this picture.

Gathering with psychos after 54321 months

I made my brother cried on his 21st birthday
by making him a surprise video....
and I'm quite satisfied with the end product....look at him!

Halloween party 2009~

Vince's homecoming dinner
which cost us a bomb...but really nice~

alright, that's pretty much of it, the x'mas photos are still not here yet but well, u noe how x'mas pictures gonna be like...presents, santa hats, food.....etc so u imagine la lol okay I shall go off now, I'm afraid if I continue any longer it'll be 2010 already.

Goodbye 2009 and welcome 2010~

Sneak Peek

Pictures taken by my brother...yea he was one of the photographer of the night *envy*

要记得

人生必须经历的事有很多
有些事或许不是自己想做的
但是多年以后再回头看这些事情
可能会庆幸自己曾经参与过

-阿西爸爸-

Wrong

Doing the wrong thing at the wrong time...

I hate!

最熟悉的陌生人

外表看似友谊万岁
内里可能是千苍百孔
因为曾经经历过
所以明白
那种比陌生还陌生的熟悉
有多难忍受

曾经密不可分
曾经一起遨游
曾经一起熬夜
曾经无话不谈
曾经享受沉默
曾经分享快乐
曾经分担哀愁
也曾经分享过伟大和可笑的'梦想'

当这一切都只剩下曾经
友情也只剩下虚名
唉~
我可以不要再认识
'最熟悉的陌生人' 了吗?

******************************************************

I miss her already...
I like how we never have problems,
how we never have major conflicts,
how we enjoy each other's company,
how we can always COMMUNICATE

I miss US...

FTS

Ever wonder why those whom you share your best interests with will always remain as your friends,

and

the one person who never care will always be in your heart...


This is what u call......

LOVE?

heck no!

this is 犯贱! wtf

Of Sony, Photography and Nature

I went for a 3D2N photography camp in Frim as a crew last week and I must said I've experienced and learned new things....and of cause when you went for a camp you met new people :)

here are some sneak peek...I'll come back with a more detail entry (hopefully) else this is it la. I still wana blog about the Halloween Dinner night! it was F.U.N

the camp side

going out for a short shooting....
with ponchos that make us look like a plastic bags
and.....garbage bags..

Participants busy shooting the 'breaking dawn' LOL

snap snap snap...up down left right..
every angle makes a different..

proof! I did went for the jungle trail!!

Doesn't it look like a map?
The beauty of nature..
even trees are tolerant with each other wtf

Group pic! spot me..
no prize

I bet u never use such big screen for work before..

It's very nice to use for video or picture editing..
big HUGE and clear

Ever use a TV to view ur facebook? HAAHA
I've never seen my profile picture in such a big scale before..

Pictures courtesy to Wee Ling, Horng Yih, and Click! magazine

A Good Year

I took a little time today (yesterday actually) to go down to the city by train and monorail.....alone
I just thought that the time on the train alone is the perfect time for me to ponder and start planning the road ahead me. I guess it was a fruitful day after all.

I can barely remember when was the last time I ever step foot in Sg. Wang, but this mall look a lil' bit odd during weekdays cuz it's so empty and I dare not go in to any shop because those shopkeepers aka 'young girls' look like they are all gonna eat me alive if I dun walk out their shop with something.

I just walked around the mall for about 45mins to an hour time and I left to take the next monorail back. before I reach the station, I was stopped by this youngster who approach me like a promoter or whatsoever. Just like any other normal people, I instinctively wave to get rid of it. but he followed..as usual. He claimed that he wasn't selling anything just an information so I stopped. I can't really recall what he said, it's something like a voucher or coupon. I just tear it open and when it shows a 'Thank You' I just have to sign for him to show that he is working. otherwise I would win some prize. blah, something like that la. So I agreed, got nothing to loose anyway and can help him to get his job done so why not?

and when I tear it off, it wasn't a 'Thank You' in other words, I won something (kononnya la). He was like so excited and asked me to call his boss to verify. and then he took out newspaper cutout to show me that their company had been publishing ads every month to give out prizes. HAAHAHA the minute I saw I won the prize, I'd been laughing because it look so fake. His acting also damn lousy. I refused to call his supervisor and gave him back the ticket. He was like...u won something u also dun wan ar? LOL I just said I'm rushing home because it's gonna rain...which is true because I din bring umbrella! He knew I was in doubt, and he tried to talk me into making the call by saying I can only show you the newspaper as proof. I just smile and said I'm not interested but inside my heart I was like "yea, I can also show you ALOT OF newspaper cutout on how those innocent young and old ladies got conned"

Moral of the story is: Prizes like cars don't just drop from the sky so don't believe it! walked away even if you won (or they said so). Trust me, you'd rather lost something you thought you have than to really lost something you have.

Oh, one thing I hate about going downtown is, the frigging monorail station is outside KL Central. I have to walk under the insanely hot sun to reach the monorail. and I haven been taking public transport for AGES~~~ hence I can only go around based on my memory. I almost shock to death when I came out of KL Central building. because the usual carpark infront of it is under construction, I used to walk through the carpark to reach the station, suddenly I duno where to go =.= and I had to frigging walk around the construction area to reach the opposite.
It was a good experience anyhow. and I have this good feeling about life suddenly thanx to this trip. I've gained something that I do not know how to put it in words to tell you but I saw sunshine after rain. :)

"You've arrived at a moment in your life of marvelous freedom. No deadlines, no appointments no responsibilities....this is a turning point, an ideal time for you to take a break, look at what fate and Uncle Henry have dumped in your lap and decide what you want to do...." -Charlie, A Good Year

Of Cartoons and Animations

Some of you may have already know I love SailorMoon series...since God can remember when..but you din know that there are actually a few more series of cartoons and animations that I watched and grew up with...

1. Dragonball


haha okay this is totally at the other end of the pretty soldiers series but I watched! I watched most of it, from Z to GT....wattudo I grew up with 6 cousin brothers who are approx the same age as me..when we were fighting for which cartoon to watch on tv, I always lost to them because all 6 of them will pick dragonball fml I hate democracy!

2. Slamdunk


I read every episode of the comic and started to like basketball..tried to watch NBA live but I found that it was not as excited as reading the comic..I would say the comic is much better that the animation..hmmm dun ask me why I just think so..Kaede is so damn cool that I once dreamed for bf who can play bball..Hanachimi is a total idiot but slam dunk won't be interesting without him..oh just so you know, I represented my class to play bball during primary 6 and no! dun ask about the result...

3. Tom and Jerry


Do I need to explain further? This is one classic of the classic..it's one of the all time favorite!

4. Pink Panther


I miss this ALOT!! I dun see any dvd shops selling this anymore, I wana watch it again because this was sooooo very ancient time ago that I can barely remember the details of it. I saw one the shop in pyramid playing it the other day and I just stood there and watched..

before I go,

My ALL TIME FAVORITE!

p/s: what the hell is happening to Grey's Anatomy?! Izzie really left? I dun like the feeling of the new season!! it's so not the GA we used to watch, too many new faces..I miss George already! I miss when all 5 of them together...

ICQ

means Idiot Customers' Questions....

There is a reason why I agreed that customers are idiots..because they asked questions like:

1. ..so the journey is five hours sharp right?

excuse me? what kinda question do you think you are asking? I feel like a fool for answering it =.= that is estimation arrival time la...have to depend on the traffic flow of the day also right? FIVE HOURS SHARP right?!!!! wtf

2. ..why isn't my wife picking up the phone?

oh man...I so have to explain this one because he wasn't ASKING he was literally shouting and everyone in the office can hear him...he called his wife who is on the bus coming back from Singapore but he couldn't reached her after trying several calls attempts and text messages..and he thought our driver left her somewhere =.=" and we called our driver and double confirm that the bus is coming back with the correct amount of people when it left SIN....and he asked us this fml... how the hell did we know why isn't your wife picking up the phone????????!!!


I'll most probably come back with another entry with more questions if I happen to encounter more....

customers are idiot! seriously...no joke
*i know..I am customer as well in other settings..but I still agree with this statement!

54321 years ago

I look like this..and I think I look cute wtf

不要哭

不要因为一次的失败，不敢再出发!

道路纵使再崎岖，只要能带着微笑，没有跨越不过的障碍。大不了绕路再走 - youzi

Psychos Meet up

Gathering with Datin Khoo

I hope the next dinner together is not too long away...


p/s: it was a wrong move to stand behind Mr. Lim...see the contrast! =.=

Summer Nights

6:02pm on a mid autum festival's Sat ..I'm still in the office working other people's shift FML

well, actually I'm not really complaining as there isn't much people traveling today hence it's not so busy..just that I was expecting to go home happily at the afternoon and have a good nap so I can go out at night to have some fun..but I'm very exhausted after 11.5 hrs sitting in the office. so I guess I'll just stay in for the night...celebrate with my series.

I'm going TJ Haus again tmr night! the last time we went was during Rachel's birthday, God that was like 3 months ago. I miss everyone, haven seen most of them for long~ and I hope everyone can make it ;)

What else to update? my life is so dull, I dun have anything interesting to talk about. Why not u tell me your life? interesting life I mean, not everything about yourself, constipation no need to tell me okay wtf I dun really need to know that

p/s: The title has got nothing to do with the entry..I got no title to post and I dun wana put it as random, hence I just fill in with whatever song that I'm listening..damn creative I know :P

I'm feeling lucky

Just a few words before I head to bed....

I'm planning to stop the part time job in the coach company soon..most probably by Nov..it's not that I'm unhappy with the job but I seriously getting annoyed by those I-bought-your-coach-ticket-hence-I'm-ur-grandfather kinda customers...I'm losing my patient..I'm afraid one day I might just loose it and strangle someone to death...

Customers are idiots (WTJ, 2009) [so totally agree!! I can't remember when exactly but I think I read this somewhere in your blog before]

********

We should treasure every moments of our life to the fullest...dun let death reminds us how fragile our life is...

********

有的人说不清哪里好，但就是谁都替代不了

----遗失的美好，张韶函

p/s: oh...happy belated birthday to ma darling dearest who is now in Lund enjoying her 32GB ipod touch *sour*
*BIG hugs~*

不全然快乐

2009年只剩下最后的1/3了
过去的八个月 除了失望还是失望

我不全然快乐
虽然很多时候 我并没有表现出来
我想说的是 我不是在别人面前刻意掩饰一些不开心的情绪
跟你们在一起的时候我是开心的
只是有些事情我不说 并不是我不想说
而是我自己都不知道要从哪里说起

我只是觉得我是快乐却又不快乐的
也可能是因为我一直没有一种踏实的感觉
太多的不确定总是让人恐慌
可能是我一直没有认真觉得我一定要什么 非做什么不可
随遇而安 顺其自然的生活方式
也不见得就会快乐

我最近一直放人鸽子 某些人好像生气了
可是我很懒得解释
要编一个美丽的谎言 其实很难
所以我选择不解释
不提就当作解决了
我不像以前那么在乎别人怎么想了
这样的改变 也不知道是好还是坏

但人生 就像我之前说的
不变的是改变
有些事情不想接受 有些事情无法不接受
虽然是很无奈
但也没办法




是我太伤悲 还是城市太灰

Oh Yeah~

*Warning: Long post ahead*

I think this is the longest hiatus in my entire blog.

I'm not doing anything productive and at the same time living very unhealthily. Sleeping at 4 or 5am in the morning for 2 weeks now. I think I got this insomnia problem from my dad because he also have sleep disturbance =.=

That aside. It's not the main point anyway.

I've been wanting to blog the past few days, so many things happened within the past 2 weeks. Not only around me but also around the world. The Morakot typhoon in Taiwan, Horng's really short returning trip, gathering with high school mates, dinner with Celeste, Hui Chin and Horng after 54321 years....

As you might alread know, the Morakot typhoon hit Taiwan on the 8th Aug and there were more than 500 lives killed to date. It was such a tragic disaster, I cried reading the news about the landslides that buried the whole Siaolin Village after the heavy downpour. 400 over victims were buried alive. It is very saddening watching them crying and shouting for their late family members who were yet to be found. Reading news like this, apart from feeling thankful that it doesn't happen on us, we hope and pray that the victims can get through this ASAP.

Horng came back from Perth to attend his sister's registration so we met up for some gathering/catch up/gossip/cam whore session. Karena and the girls had throw him a welcome home colorful party. No kidding man, EVERYTHING is colored! I saw sandwiches with blue and pink tuna spread =__= and many many balloons! We had fun snapping pictures away..and because Horng misses mamak too much so we proceed to mamak before heading home.


The next day, met up with S, V, Horng, Henry, Celeste and Hui Chin at Jaya One for dinner. Celeste and Hui Chin came to KL for a short trip to visit friends so we decided to meet up. We had dinner at Frontera, a Mexican restaurant. We had really awesome nachos, very spicy(at least to me) buffalo wings, and great company =) after dinner we went to this bar outside the restaurant for drinks. According to Henry, this bar has all kinds of beer or something like that. and we sat there for about 1 hour plus and decided to do things like this:

and this

and this

and this

must be the alcohol........must be!

*************

I saw this line on a friend's msn the other day: The only thing that is constant is change

How true is that? I've got so much free time the past 3 weeks and I realized that I've been reminiscing alot about the past. There were so many moments I miss but we can never turn back the time and live it again....

Those baby days...when all you have to do is eat, sleep, cry and play...you don't even have to walk on your own feet.....but we can't go back to those days...

Secondary schools...when we were still in there, we never thought we would miss it so much.

National Service! I certainly miss them...although those were the hardest 3 months ever living in a jungle and sleeping in a camp but these people make it one of the best memories in my life.
Ohh..I look so man!

We can hardly get together like this anymore....very very very hard.....

I miss them!!!! and I can't go back anymore..............
T____T

I was having lunch alone in one u the other day. Walking from old wing to new wing, suddenly I miss my BFFL. Every corner of One u reminds me of her....I miss u heaps babe!

*****************

Remember I said I have a new found idol last year? Recently I'm watching her new series KO3anguo. I think she is doing a pretty good job considering the fact that this is actually her first time acting.

I'm actually more attracted to her songs than the series. Her voice is just so amazing and I can repeatedly listening to that few songs the whole night. I can't wait for her to come up with her own album...The best part is......she is also a fan of YanZi =D

Here's the 2 songs I'm listening every night...

*MUST LISTEN*

泪了 - 曾沛慈

够爱 - 曾沛慈

The truth is...

Hello world,

I'm still very much alive just in case some of you thought that I was dead or was abducted. I'm sorry for not returning any calls and messages because I was not in the mood to talk or to meet anyone. So I've canceled most of the outing and gathering plans by telling them that I'm busy but the truth is I'm just staying home doing nothing. Please don't feel offended, I just thought that I really need those moments alone and stay in my comfort zone for a little while.

I'd been doing a lot of thinking, or so I call it. Someone once said, everyone did lost their way in life at some point of time. But I think I'm constantly on the search. I don't know where is my life heading to and what am I going to do next. I always don't. As age catches up, this is actually very frustrating. Friends offer their ears, especially when you are studying psychology, you have sensitive friends who notice the changes in you. The thing is, I never like to talk about it. because I know when I start talking I will break down. I may look perfectly ok on the outside but in this whole wide world, I'm the only one who knows that 'hey, you're not okay!' I think that's a defense mechanism, it sealed everything that I do not wish to touch in a bag and cover it up with a cheerful face.

It's funny how I got so thirsty everytime I came home from a gathering or a drinks with friends. Because I talked ALOT when I'm out. By cracking jokes with them, it makes everyone believe that I'm actually okay, including myself. but when I'm back home, back to my room when everyone else were taken away from the picture, I'm actually back to square one. The feeling is like a superstar standing on the stage enjoying the cheers and applauses from the audience but when he step down from the stage he is back to one person, alone. The contrast feeling in between is so huge that it can kill. It's okay if this doesn't sound sane to you but it makes perfect sense to me.

I believe that everything happened for a reason and I still do. So I can always comfort myself that 'It's ok, there must be something better waiting for me in front', if anything goes wrong. As long as I live up to my own expectation, I don't see any needs to seek for others' approval. Unfortunately, we are not living in here on our own. Approval from different parties give us the sense of security, self-esteem and sense of belonging. Their approval make us believe that we are normal and being accepted. Hence, failure and mistakes are not scary, what fear us most is the disapproval and disappointment that come along with it.

Sometimes I look myself in the mirror, I feel like I don't know myself anymore. I am not who I used to be. There are too many things and feelings kept inside and at some point of time it feels like exploding. At times I wish I could cry like a baby, you know like really crying out loud and so I would feel better but I can't! I just can't!!!!!!! There's a voice inside my head telling me to run, run away from all the things and people I know to a place where I can be who I am and who I wana be. but I know it's not gonna happen.

I am writing this because I hope that at least I can be true to my own feeling and be true to myself. The last thing I wana get is the extra attention from friends. so just read this and keep it to yourself, don't ask me anything. =)







The truth will soon be revealed....

Nick Vujicic

"sometimes in life when u fall down, and you feel like you don't have the strength to get back up, do you think you have hope?"

"because I tell you, I'm down here face down and I've no arms no legs, it should be impossible for me to get back up, but it's not!"

"...and if I failed 100 times. If I failed and I give up do you think that I'm ever gonna get up? NO"

"but if I failed and I try again and again...I just want you to know that it's not the end, it matters how you gonna finish. Are you gonna finish strong? and you will find that strength to get back up.."


the first time I watched this..I cried.
after so long....I still cried Y___Y

...

原来还有一种感觉,比死亡更恐怖,比失恋更痛!

一个人如果没有活下去的勇气,
至少还有结束自己生命的勇气,
如果两者皆失,
那你还剩下什么?

泪了- 曾沛慈

天快亮了 能不能別離開呢
沉默像首悲傷的歌 無聲視線卻模糊了

你要走了 也帶走所有快樂
甜蜜的片段散落了 你倦了 心冷了 我哭了

那流星閃過 我們許下一個願望
要在一起 絕不分離 你怎麼放棄了

星空在閃爍 像你的眼淚悄悄劃過
當你放開了手 離開的時候 有沒有一點捨不得我
淚光在閃爍 而我的眼淚忍住 不敢墜落
我還留在黑暗守候 你卻已經遠遠離開我

離開我了 夢醒了還剩什麼
我要的幸福消失了 你的心曾經屬於我的

那流星閃過 我們許下一個願望
要在一起 絕不分離 你怎麼放棄了

星空在閃爍 像你的眼淚悄悄劃過
當你放開了手 離開的時候 有沒有一點捨不得我
淚光在閃爍 而我的眼淚忍住 不敢墜落
我還留在黑暗中守候 你卻已經遠遠離開我

有過的快樂 我都記得
回憶還旋轉著 愛怎麼停了 我們都淚了~

星空在閃爍 像你眼淚悄悄劃過)
當你放開了手 離開的時候 有沒有一點捨不得我
淚光在閃爍 而我的眼淚 忍住不敢墜落
我還留在黑暗中守候 你卻已經遠遠離開

She is a great singer!

Swedish 101

Tjenna Rachel,

du ä sockis, grattis!!
Jag saknar dig



okay, that's all I know about swedish...shall pick up some more when I meet my teacher LOL come online more often ya ;)

Post exam moments

so the exam was over...but without much confident on your paper, you can't really say that it was over officially...

anyway..no point worrying about what was over and what will happen..living in here and now! speaking of here and now..I really need to start practicing it. I've been worrying too much about things in the future and forgot to live. and I've decided to take up some class...let it be painting, music or some random classes..I NEED to do something else! my life is not only about research and report....

This after-exam-period is quite different. We had lunch at lunch box opposite college because I have a thesis briefing later on and some of them gonna rush off for interviews for their internship next semester. so we settle all our stuff and meet up in amp square for some karaoke session...those sammi cheng, BSB and spice girls songs bring us back to all the upper primary and secondary era...

Around evening, we drove all the way to look out point for dinner. first time there and the weather was too hazy yet the night view was still superb! it would be perfect if there wasn't any durian smell =.= I was very exhausted after the dinner but I feel so reluctant to go home..cz the next time I see everyone might be next year! Y___Y I'm gonna miss everyone! miss the class time, miss the library study time...

okay enough, this is not the time to be emo (Sun, 2009).

all the best in your internship, I hope u meet a good boss and treat me lunch when u get pay :P *message to all batch 5 psychos*
and good luck to YOU and ME in thesis!

Library nightmares...

one more to go and we are done with this sem! ...........hopefully....

been spending time in the library...most of the days

tshui sun the plumber..fixing the pipes! :P

one last paper! let's all K.O. it!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

it'd been exactly one week now....I still haven got a chance to catch up with her online!! I totally hate this time zone difference shit! just manage to send each other offline messages =.= for the first time I appreciate the function of offline messaging..

I hope I dun have to wait until Sept to see u coming online T___T
I miss u BFFL!