Wound

So many times I've told myself NOT to think and LET it go, but so many times I failed! I am happy that somehow we still remain as friends on the other hand I hate the feeling of pretending..like NOTHIN ever happen! It kills everytime when I see the light of hope shine in our way and yet the next thing I know is it's just an illusion...it happened so so so many times and I am exhausted on guessing who am I to you in ur heart..

If you happen to read this, can you tell me everything that I need to know so that I can stop puttin in any hope?! Each passing sec is tearing me into pieces, and it's falling everywhere that I duno where to collect it and put it back into one piece!! I never know heartbreak can last this long and cut this deep....and I wasn't sure if there's anyone can heal the wound